August Mental Health Minute
ACT: Learning to Ride the Waves (Without Letting Your Thoughts Take Over)
Have you ever had a thought show up and immediately act like it was the boss?
“I’m not doing enough.”
“What if something goes wrong?”
“I should have handled that better.”
“Everyone else seems to have it together except me.”
Our minds are incredible. They help us plan, problem-solve, keep us safe, and prepare for the future. But sometimes our brains get a little overprotective and start treating every uncomfortable feeling like an emergency.
This is where Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) comes in.
ACT (pronounced like the word act) is a therapeutic approach that helps us build a healthier relationship with our thoughts, emotions, and experiences. Rather than spending all of our energy trying to eliminate difficult feelings, ACT teaches us how to make space for them while still moving toward the things that matter most.
Because the truth is:
A meaningful life doesn’t come with a “no difficult emotions allowed” policy.
Wait… Aren’t We Supposed to Get Rid of Negative Thoughts?
This is one of the most surprising parts of ACT.
Many of us have learned that feeling better means:
- getting rid of anxiety
- stopping negative thoughts
- avoiding uncomfortable emotions
- always staying positive
But have you ever noticed that the harder you try not to think about something, the louder it seems to become?
(Like when someone says, “Don’t think about an elephant.” 🐘)
ACT takes a different approach.
Instead of asking:
“How do I make this feeling go away?”
ACT invites us to ask:
“How can I make room for this feeling while still choosing how I want to show up?”
Because we can feel afraid and still be brave.
We can feel uncertain and still move forward.
We can feel overwhelmed and still take one small step.
Two things can be true at the same time.
The Passengers on the Bus 🚌
One of my favourite ACT metaphors is imagining that you are driving a bus.
You are the driver.
On your bus are all kinds of passengers:
🚌 Anxiety
🚌 Self-doubt
🚌 Your inner critic
🚌 Perfectionism
🚌 Fear
🚌 Worry
🚌 “What if” thoughts
Some days, these passengers sit quietly in the back.
Other days, they are standing up, shouting directions, and insisting they know exactly where you should go.
“Turn around!”
“Don’t try that!”
“You’re going to mess this up!”
ACT doesn’t ask you to throw those passengers off the bus.
Instead, ACT helps us notice:
“Oh, anxiety is here today.”
“My perfectionist part is working overtime.”
“My brain is trying really hard to protect me.”
And then gently return to the driver’s seat.
The passengers can come along for the ride, but they don’t get to decide the destination.
The Six ACT Skills (In Real-Life Language)
🌱 Acceptance
Making room for difficult emotions instead of constantly fighting against them.
“I can feel uncomfortable and still be okay.”
🧠 Cognitive Defusion
Learning to notice thoughts without automatically believing everything they say.
Instead of:
“I’m failing.”
Try:
“I’m noticing I’m having the thought that I’m failing.”
A thought is something your mind creates. It is not always a fact.
✨ Being Present
Coming back to the current moment instead of getting stuck replaying the past or worrying about the future.
💛 Self-as-Context
Remembering that you are more than your thoughts, feelings, mistakes, roles, or circumstances.
You are the person noticing the experience, not the experience itself.
🧭 Values
Identifying what truly matters to you.
“What kind of person do I want to be?”
“What do I want my life to stand for?”
👣 Committed Action
Taking small steps toward your values, even when difficult thoughts and emotions show up.
A Simple ACT Practice to Try This Month 🌻
The next time you notice a difficult thought, try adding:
“I’m noticing my mind is telling me…”
Examples:
Instead of:
“I’m a terrible parent.”
Try:
“I’m noticing my mind is telling me I’m a terrible parent.”
Instead of:
“I can’t handle this.”
Try:
“I’m noticing my mind is telling me this is too much.”
This small shift creates space between you and the story your mind is telling.
And in that space, we often find choice.
Your August Reflection
As summer begins to wind down, many of us experience a mix of emotions:
☀️ excitement
☀️ sadness
☀️ anticipation
☀️ stress
☀️ gratitude
☀️ uncertainty
Instead of asking:
“How do I stop feeling this way?”
Try asking:
“How do I want to show up while this feeling is here?”
That question brings us back to our values and the life we want to create.
A Gentle August Reminder 🌿
You don’t have to wait until you feel less anxious, more confident, more rested, or completely certain before you begin living your life.
You can bring your worries with you.
You can carry your doubts.
You can have uncomfortable feelings and still move toward what matters.
Your feelings are visitors.
Your thoughts are stories your mind creates.
You are the person noticing them.
And you get to choose your next step.
Because courage is not the absence of fear.
Courage is choosing your values even when fear comes along for the ride.
Wishing you a gentle and meaningful August,
Stephanie
